New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
I wish i was in the wii world.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
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