we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
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