Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
