I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder meâ€
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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