you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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