5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
