dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
Randomize
