I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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