...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize
