chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Randomize
