Soap is not a condiment
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
third nipple confirmed
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
