You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Randomize
