Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize