Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
