How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
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