Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
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