I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
