just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize