There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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