I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
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