I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize
