Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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