I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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