You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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