I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
