well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
