I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
