Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
