In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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