My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
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