She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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