This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
