two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
