i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
