What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
