Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Boobs speak an international language.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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