We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Randomize
