apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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