erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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