Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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