u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Randomize
