i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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