If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize