WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
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