Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
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