so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
