4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Randomize
