Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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