The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
