idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
MIDGETS
????
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Randomize
