Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
