I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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